Devil in Me
by KatastrophicKat
Summary: Inspired by the song "Devil in Me" by Jamie N. Commons (For those of you who watch the Walking Dead, he is the one who sings "Lead Me Home" which is the song playing at the end of the episode where the backpack guy is killed because NO ONE HELPED HIM!) Paul LaHote never had an easy life.. His father was an alcoholic with a flare for abuse and hatred. His mother was gone, possibly


Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.  
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Pairing: Paul/Bella  
Rating: R to be safe  
Genre: Angst

Summary: Inspired by the song "Devil in Me" by Jamie N. Commons (For those of you who watch the Walking Dead, he is the one who sings "Lead Me Home" which is the song playing at the end of the episode where the backpack guy is killed because NO ONE HELPED HIM!)

Paul LaHote never had an easy life.. His father was an alcoholic with a flare for abuse and hatred. His mother was gone, possibly dead.. Then there was Bella Swan. Broken, just like him, he sees himself in Bella. (Bella is unaware of the supernatural)

Paul groaned as the shrill buzzing of his alarm clock broke through the fog of his precious sleep. He rolled over and smacked his hand ontop of the loud annoyance and then sat up with a groan. Rubbing his eyes, he looked around his room with a sigh. Clothes were strewn about, papers were scattered or ripped.. He even had three broken lamps on his floor. If he was still able to get drunk, he would have blamed the dingy, unkept room on the alcohol. As it stood, he hadn't been able to get drunk for some time. His "genetic spiritual gift" of phasing into a wolf had seen to that.

He stood and shuffled his way down the hall and into the kitchen, making man noises and scratching his ass through his boxers as he did so. As he passed into the kitchen, he let his hands pass over the crack in the dark green wall. It was a ritual, a reminder, even though he was no longer that small and the crack was now barely nipple high.

_No daddy! Please stop! I'm sorry!_

He shook the voice of his toddler self out of his head and flicked on the coffee pot. Not even hoping for a scrap of food to be in the house, he prayed Emily had something he could eat. Though he hated charity from others, he hated starving more.

He thought back to the reason he was more tired this morning than usual and groaned. He had been called out last night with Jared and Sam to look for Bella Swan. She had went for a walk, according to her father Charlie, and hadn't come back.

They had found her easy enough, even though it was raining. She was curled up in the fetal position muttering things even they didn't hear. Sam phased back and sent them home before picking the girl up in his arms. She had curled into his warmth instantly. Paul knew the girl wasn't simply cold though. She was broken. Whatever her beloved leech had said or done to her, he could see straight through now to the cracks in her soul.

_I'll break you! You're nothing and no one will ever love you! That whore mother of yours isn't here to protect you anymore!_

With a growl he downed his coffee and grabbed a pair of cutoffs from the laundry room. He tied them to his leg before stomping through the door and phasing off the porch. Little scraps of his boxers flew around as a large silver wolf took his place..

Bella woke up... She dragged herself out of bed and padded into the bathroom while trying to hold herself together.

She showered, but the only indication that the water was warm or even falling down on her skin was the bright red glow it had when she was done. She brushed her hair, she dressed and she went downstairs.

Though her stomach turned in protest, she downed her coffee and a few pieces of toast. She was sitting at the table when Charlie came downstairs. He stopped and gingerly walked over to her, "You okay, Bells?"

She shook her head, "Not really. Edward made me feel like I was the most amazing person in the world. He brought me into his family. Instead of a birthday party like I thought I was going to have, I got my heart broken. He led me into the woods, and told me how worthless I am. He told me his family was leaving because Carlisle got a better job offer somewhere else. He told me he didn't want to hear from me, and that he wouldn't try to contact me as well. And then he left me."

Charlie sighed, "Bella, you're worth everything and then some."

Bella pasted a fake smile on her face, "Thanks dad. Have a good day at work."

He eyed her warily, "Are you going to be okay?"

Internally, Bella knew she wasn't going to be okay. However, if Charlie knew how broken she was, he would never go to work.

"I'll be fine. I'm thinking of going to the beach in La Push to check out the tide pools."

The time to check them would be over by the time she got there, so she thanked Charlie's blissful ignorance. He nodded, kissed her on the cheek and left.

Bella would go to the beach. But she wouldn't be checking tide pools.

Gathering what she needed, she stepped outside and locked the door. She threw everything into her truck and headed to her first stop. The Cullen Mansion was deserted. She had been there enough to know when even one of them was home, and that place was desolate.

Perfect.

She got out of her truck and picked up one of the large stones Esme had lining her garden. She tossed it in her hands a few times before walking up to the door and hurling it through the large glass oval in the door. She stepped through gingerly and made her way around the house.

The furniture was covered. Esme's art no longer decorated the wall. The multitude of graduation caps that Esme collected from every place they went no longer hung on the wall. It was empty. They were gone. And the house mirrored her- Abandoned.

She went into Carlisle's study with no hope left that what she was seeking was still there.. But it was. With a joyous cry, she ran to the giant liquor cabinet. Unlocked.. Perfect.

She ran back out to the truck to grab her bags and then dashed back in. Shebegan to take every ounce of the expensive liquors. Brandy, Vodka, Rum- It all went into her bag. She would stash it away so Charlie never found it.

She left with her haul and a little hum, ready to go to the beach. The home was left with broken glass, no alcohol at all within it, and a broken piano that Bella "accidentally" beat the shit out of with a hammer that she "didnt know could hurt it."

She snorted at that, but who cared what she thought. Certainly not the Cullens, because they were gone.

She sat on the beach watching the waves and slowly sipping on a bottle of Vodka. The first few sips were disgusting but she had slowly settled into the liquor and now it was as easy as drinking water.

That's where Paul found her..

She looked so broken. So lost. And very drunk. Paul had finished his patrol and was about to head home when he saw the truck. Deciding to investigate, he was shocked to see Bella Swan. He phased back and pulled on his cutoffs before making himself look like he was taking a casual stroll.

He stopped when he was close and looked down at her stash of liquor. He remembered when that was his escape. The devil in him, telling him he was just like his father.

_Just like me, Pauly! I'll make you JUST LIKE ME!_

He plopped down in the sand, "You don't need that, Bella."

She jumped and looked at him startled, "You don't know what I need, Paul. I got built up by a gorgeous man. Sure, his family was a little strange but I didn't care. He made me fall in love. Then he told me I was worthless and took me into the woods to die."

"But Sam, Jared and I found you!"

She turned to glare at him but then their eyes met. Paul's broken soul danced at it's broken mate.

How fitting that his imprint should be as damaged as he is.

"Let me help you, Bella... There are things you need to know."

*2 years later*

Bella sat on that same beach. It had been a long time from where she was then to now. True to his word, Paul had helped her. He had told her all about Edward and his family. She was disgusted with herself and had actually thrown up anytime anything reminded her of them for a week. But Paul and the pack had been kind. She found solace in Paul's hard chest, and in a bottle when he was gone.

She fought her demons everyday. She still remembered the look in Paul's eyes when he had come home and saw her sitting in the wreckage of their glass coffee table. She was in a drunken rage, with cuts all down her arms.

"Baby, please stop." That's all he whispered. She tried to hit him, but he simply grabbed her hand and kissed her wrist, "Please stop." She tried to pull away, but he held her closer, "Please.. Stop." And so she had. That was how they calmed each other. She didn't know if it was the imprint or the fact that she wanted to be better for at least one person. Sure, they fought.. But they never left.

Now, she was sitting on this beach surrounded by her family as Mrs. Paul LaHote. He came and plopped beside her again, as he had done all these years ago.

"Regret it yet?"

"Not a chance, Paul."

He smirked, "All my life?"

"All my days."

He took her hand and traced the lines of the tattoo he had on his wrist as well.

_There's A Devil In Me_


End file.
